Now, I have the right to be philosophical today ! Why should I shut my eyes to what I am seeing everyday, every second.... reality. Sometimes it feels like shouting out loud 'Life is beautiful, life is beautiful . . . blah blah',..... and sometimes, it feels strange to find that what the heck is going on ! This is not right. But these shouts just bounce back, and everything remains the same. Oh, yeah, it does.

It has happened before, 6 years back, and it happened again yessterday, and it will ofcourse happen again. It is like reality hitting you right into your face. I am talking about witnessing death.

Yesterday, at the condolence meeting in the auditorium, for the first time I had experienced such quietness. The entire auditorium was full, yet, everyone was so silent. It realy felt that, oh yeah, something was wrong. It was difficult to believe actually! And now, today, I went for my classes... everything was the same. The same noise in the lecture theatre, the same comments on teachers, the same unsuccessful attempts of faculty to generate interest amongst the students, the same wave of pleasure after the teacher concludes the class, the same reluctance for the uncooked food in the dining halls, the same queues near the juice counter, the same pleasant wind while crossing the central lawn after lunch..... the very same people whom I greeted the day before yesterday, the same smiles. Damn, everything is the same! It is just that one person is missing...... and it doesn't make a difference. It is all the same.

Well, it is not that I was real close to the person I talked about in the last post or something. It is not that I am really affected by his death or something, but it is the fact that I begin to question the credibility of whatever we do... because finally we have to succumb to the end: Death! Taking the example of 'Snehith', now, he had so much knowledge about designing and animation. He knew so much, and wanted to know so much. five days back, everything existed..... all his dreams, all his knowledge, his enthusiasm, all his aspirations. And see, today, all of them have vanished into oblivion! Nothing exists today. Nothing.

People spend their entire lives hungry and greedy for things. What they don't understand is that in the end, they aren't gonna take away anything with them. As children, we want food, then new drawing books, then better grades, then better universities, then better jobs, then better partners, then better assets, ..... and the list is endless. We always put a condition to our happiness (this was one of the things discussed during the Art of Living, YES+ course). We always need something to be happy....... and by the time we achieve a bit of it, we die (or even much early).
I really don't don't know what I am trying to write .